As a mother of three young adults, the kitchen table is a sacred place. It is a place for family dinners, homework and late-night conversations. And if some of our conversations aren't juicy and/or hard as parents, we need to try harder. Here a few of my favorite resources for teens and frankly, for most of us adults...who are still finding our way!

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Journal & Conversation Starters

In a world full of technology, we have never been lonelier as a culture. Conversations are not always a cure-all solution, but they are free. 

• 135 Journal prompts -- these prompts can easily become conversation starters around the kitchen table. 

• Table Topics - I love these boxes of questions for almost every occasion. These are perfect for the kitchen table, road trips or journaling.  

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Counseling Theories & Ideas 

I like to give my clients a glimpse of some of my favorite counseling theories. Many of these resources are blog posts written by me and other resources are frankly too good not to share. Alas, my hope is that these resources give you a taste of my therapeutic style. 

• Finding Rest in the UNrest - this is a story that I presented to a corporate audience but summarizes some of my favorite ideas for finding rest and peace in our lives; much of this comes down to controlling what we can control. 

• Unresolved resentment & bitterness - I have found that many/most of my clients struggle with some resentment issues. If unresolved, resentment can slowly become a cancer that I like to call the Cancer of Bitterness. This document is something I have sent to many clients as a conversation and change starter! 

• Choice, Freedom & Responsibility -- these are three of my favorite words. Yes, you were warned. This post links to some good easy-to-read information on three of my favorite counseling theories: Reality Theory, Choice Therapy and Logotherapy. 

• Self-assessment tools - as you consider therapy or are already in therapy, I love the idea of self-assessments and staying abreast of how we are feeling and doing. While it is extremely helpful to have a thought partner and professional be a part of this assessment, feel free to use self-assessment tools like these that allow you to create perspectives that can be very useful in a therapeutic setting. 

• Distorted thinking -- these are some proven strategies for distorted thinking. Most of us are born very capable of distorted thinking but this post gives you some very tangible examples of how one might identify distorted thinking when it happens.

• Acceptance Commitment Therapy (ACT) -- this is one of my favorite counseling theories that throws a little shade on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and the idea that we can change negative thoughts -- but rather focuses on being present, defusing an0d reframing. Said another way, the premise of ACT is that our problems don’t make us broken. This just means we are human and that we can view/reframe our problems to free us up to live.

• Life's Lab of Experimentation -- I love thinking about our lives as labs. I love the idea of creating experiments. If something isn't working, we must try something new. If something isn't feeling right, it probably isn't right. Experimentation helps us to prove ourselves right or wrong. 

• Mountains in our mind - there is a good chance we can't control everything that we perceive to be big and insurmountable challenges in our lives...but we can think creatively and courageously on how we might maneuver these mountainous challenges in our mind. 

• Agency -- yes, back to some of my favorite, albeit annoying concepts -- the freedom, choice and responsibility we have. 

• Therapy in a Nutshell - I love this You Tube Channel. It is a fun an exhausting list of many of the mental health challenges the world is facing and some great pragmatic solutions.

• Quieting the voices in our head -- here are some proven strategies to "change the tape" that plays in our heads. 

• Readiness for change - here are some thought/journal prompts for being ready for change. 

• The Power of Hope -- this is one of my favorite Ted Talks on the subject of finding Hope in our lives. Chan, who delivers this Ted Talk is a co-author of the book Hope Rising. The book is awesome! You can also calculate your own Hope Score.

• Write your own manifesto -- here is a job aid to make this enjoyable and productive! 

• Find a damn hobby -- I am a big fan of encouraging clients to "find a damn hobby". Hobbies are things that are all yours. Hobbies are opportunities to escape into something you love. One of my favorite-ever descriptions of why hobbies are so important is this Elizabeth Gilbert video that explains the difference between a hobby, a job, a career and a vocation. 

• Feeling Words - I am certain I have shared this Hoffman Process feeling word list with a hundred people and I plan to continue to share it. It is hard to talk about feelings that we have yet to acknowledge. These feelings and sensations are great journal prompts. 

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Strength-based living 

We were all born with some incredible strengths but in the darker moments of our lives, we can forget what we do better than most people. 

• Personality Assessment -- This is a fun free personality assessment based on Meyers Briggs profiles, but it is a free version. The assessment is super visual and is fun to read aloud in groups. 

• Strong Interest Assessment - Created by Donald Super, one of the leading theorists on lifetime career development.  It doesn't matter your age, interests can change! The average person has between 12-20 jobs over a lifetime. The assessment is $40 but is a great conversation starter at all ages. If we can't find jobs that feel like our vocation, understanding our interests can help us spend time outside of work more intentionally. 

• Self-Directed Search (SDS) - Created by John Holland, another leading theorist in helping people find work that aligns with their personality styles. His hypothesis is that if we find work that closely aligns with our personality types, we will be happier. The six basic personality types are: Realistic, Investigative, Artistic, Social, Enterprising, and Conventional. This is $14.95. 

• Strengths Finder 2.0 - this is a book ($19) that comes with a code that allows you to take a strengths finder assessment. I really love this quick exercise that will help you identify your top five strengths that can guide career & life development.

• Here is a list of some great free personality assessments that are perfect for teens.